I stayed up all night thanks to my sore back and the stupid neighbour who kept playing that annoying music of his till 3.30 AM. I'm not too happy because of that as it's the first day of school after the Christmas holiday today and I guess I'll be sleeping like half of it. Yattaa, how fun and amusing and every-fuckin'-thing. Well at least my friends will have good time as they must be familiar of me being great company when I haven't slept at all. Yayz.

Hmmmh. I'm not feeling like going to school as I've got tons of things to do anyways. I've got drawings to draw, rpgs to play, lyrics and stories to write and above all songs to compose as well. I guess I'll lost my mind this spring. I have to read to my biology matriculation examination as well and ah, that's gonna be quite hard work. Well, I can't help that, I guess. It's my own fault I do it now. Hopefully I'll manage.

I guess I have to buy a hair colour today. I'm too bored with these old ones and I can't afford going to the hairdresser's to dye my hair. Hmmh. I guess I'll try something lighter or redder now and then colour it all orange when I get to the hairdresser's. Tomorrow I will have physiotherapy. I wonder how it'll turn out and I really hope they'll help me with this back of mine. It totally sucks as it's fuckin' sore all the time and I can't focus 100% on anything because of that.

Yay I'm going to buy some singing gear soon and then we'll be able to play even more nicely. I'm so excited.

Hey guys, I just wanted to inform you that I'm not dead. I'm on holiday and now I'm way too tired to write anything but I'll be back some day soon and then tell you stalkers things. See ya then!

Okay, hello again people and other things out there.
It's snowing pretty freaking much here at the moment and I just came inside the house as I was playing around with my snowboard there in the snow. I'm so going to learn how to handle it without killing myself (or many others) with it... Even if it kills me. What ever. Yesterday evening I was selling tickets do some dance thing and it was quite fun as I drew thousands of scetches and ate too much candies and drank lot of coffee. Tomorrow I won't do anything special as I'm on winter holiday, but on Tuesday I most likely go to shop buy some coloured papers so I can start making my poem thingie to the school. We have to collect some poems and then represent them to the class. It's not that difficult or special really, just have to do that. I'm going to introduce some Lauri Viita's poems.

On Wednesday or Thursday we will go to Oulu and I have to buy either pants or a skirt as I don't have those... And maybe a t-shirt if I find a nice one but if I don't, then I have to survive without one. Luckily I bought one yellow few weeks ago... Well, what else? On the other day of those two, Wednesday or Thursday, I'm also going to Iso-Syöte with my beloved snowboard and my aunt is coming with me. She's going to ski and I'm going to kill myself with the snowboard as I really can't use it. It doesn't matter as I have to learn it before school's skiing day when we'll go to Ruka and snowboard there. I can't afford renting skis there so I have to use the board which I own. :D

Anna is dead now. The gods told me so as I asked them, why hadn't she came to breakfast. I asked that because Anna was never late when it was about food. I found it didn't matter if Anna came to eat breakfast or not, as she was already little chubby. She wouldn't have starved to death like the poor African kids, even though she had skipped the meal or two. However, I didn't believe the food killed Anna, but maybe I should have.

That morning was really irritating otherwise too. The double lesson of physics annoyed me and I hadn't even bothered to do my homework. I thought the homework was useless, just as useless as the physic itself. The novelists don't need physic! At least the ones who write stories about crimes and adventures and how friendship turns disgusting and arch enemies become lovers. Anna always said that she will become that kind of writer and I never believed. She didn't even look like one who could be awarded by the Norwegians which you have to use to feed the starving kids in the name of ethics themselves. No, she looked like one whose lap the drunken Norwegian man could barf on when sitting on the airplane on way from the Thailand to London and Oslo. I played with that though for all the physic lesson. I even had time to write a short biography of the Norwegian man in my notebook, until the god of physic noticed that I wasn't paying attention to his obviously great speech about the structural formulas of the molecules. He wasn't very friendly, as he never was.

The expression on the god of physic's face was serious and he told he was very sorry for his thoughtlessness and that he was worried about how I can carry on and have courage to be at school even though I've heard tragic news on the morning. Having my poker face on, I told I was fine. I think I even smiled at him to make him surprised. The god of physic returned to tell about the formulas and I carried on with my writings.

The morning felt just like any other morning, as long as it could be called a morning. I went to the classes and discussed with few of my fellow students which seemed to be far away in their own worlds. I didn't understand what was wrong with them, but they told later that they just were so sad about Anna that time. They must have kept me as an emotionless bastard but maybe they were right. That morning I didn't miss Anna or weren't sad for her at all, as I though she wasn't dead. Vice versa, she was suffering the pain of life being sick in the bed upstairs and the gods were just lying for us all. It wouldn't have been the first time.

When the morning changed to a day, it started to rain. The people had already told me that there was something strange which hadn't been there before hanging from the belfry, but I didn't occur to look at there before it started to rain. It wasn't really rain's fault – it was because something red was dripping down from the tower's wall. I thought it seemed like blood, but I wasn't sure if I should be worried about it and tell some of the gods. They wouldn't have been interested anyways, so I didn't bother to tell them about the whole thing. I was soaking wet and I would have liked to go inside already, but I couldn't help myself from watching what I could find from the tower. I went a few yards away and tried to see what was hanging there. It was too dark and I couldn't find out what it was. I saw only the shadow and something white. If one wanted to know what was there, one should've gone seeing it themselves. I wondered why the gods hadn't noticed anything and why hadn't anyone told them, even though all the subservient knew perfectly well that everything wasn't under control in the tower. That time I got a very good idea.

The birds were quiet and the rain was still pounding against the ancient roofs of the Kingdom. The darkness had finally arrived and in the place, where every single path had turned to a little brook it was impossible to keep your shoes wet when walking. There were five of us: Jekyll, Rock-Rock, Ohio, Berry and I, and every single one of us had been caught of wandering around the grounds at the dead of night which was of course against the rules of the Kingdom, very wrong, forbidden and punishable. The light of our flashlights were dancing around the muddy yard, making Berry even more afraid of getting caught than ever. Berry was really a chicken and he hated nothing more than adventures and danger – or loved! His dark face got pale, eyes flashed nervously and normally happily laughing mouth changed to a tight line and his chin started to wobble. I had really no Idea why James Adrian Johnson-Wilson was called Berry, but that's what we always called him and his mother did too.

The nicknames of us others had stories behind them and they mostly were about our backgrounds and how we met each other. For example I, Lara, had got my name from the sock ad woman who I was told to look like. Once I was stopped when walking on the street and asked why I was wearing pants, even though I'd have great legs too. I asked how in the name of Cthulhu himself he knew that and he told he saw them in the advertise in front of the cinema. There was commercial of Lara-branded nylon tights. This boy, born in America, was in our town for his first summer as he had just moved from Ohio – and that's why I started to call him Ohio. When we went back to school on autumn, Ohio met my old friend Jekyll there and made friends with him also.

Jekyll has been Jekyll since third grade. It comes from the book report he made about Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and the fact he's always been such a science person and inventing everything strange and dangerous. Usually his tests get horribly wrong too. Then there is Rock-Rock, the kid who is always told to use his school uniform by the gods and who still keeps wearing his own creepy clothes. We get to know Rock-Rock in the Manchester Record Shop (which really wasn't in Manchester but it was still called that) when we were about thirteen or fourteen years old. He was working there for summer as his family didn't really have money to get him educated.  Not like the boy himself would've been keen on studying at all, no, it was his father who was the ambitious engineer and wanted his son to be the same. Rock-Rock however wanted to become a guitar player and go around the World with some famous band.

The Kingdom didn't wake up in the flashes of our flashlights, even though we – especially Berry – had first been afraid of it. We were all wet like hell when we arrived to the heavy wooden door whose lock seemed to been handled by a burglar.

"Oh fuck, look at that," Rock-Rock said, pointing the broken lock with his flashlight. "It'd be better not to get caught of this, guys, or they thing we broke that thing."
"What if there's a burglar?" said Ohio laughing. Berry looked like me after a horror movie.
"Who'd be mad enough to burglar the old belfry on the front yard of a boarding school?" asked Jekyll authentically interested.  Ohio rolled his eyes.
"If there was a burglar, we'd teach him few lines of the Jungle Law. What ever, he's making our job fucking easier," Rock-Rock said, clicking his knuckles. Then he took the broken door handle and pulled the dusty oak door open. The insides of the tower were all solid darkness.

"After you, ladies," he told and grinned. No one else did even smile. The lights of our lamps swept the dusty floor, which had a huge red spot on it as some red liquid had fell down on it.
"Oh, they slough pigs here these days?" asked Rock-Rock laughing. Berry was nervous, obviously he found that Rock-Rock was taking it all way too lightly.
"What if someone has been killed here?" Berry asked with trembling voice. He looked at the dark red spot which has already became sucked up on the wooden floor, as the disgust got up his face.
"Well, no one has," said Jekyll relaxed, "It's not blood. What if it's paint?"
I rose my shoulders, showing my uncertainty and walked towards the stairs, which were going around the tower and leading to a deck, where the bell could be rang. It was the only place where you could see the mystic object clearly. Everyone were following me, until Rock-Rock strode beyond me. Berry was way behind everyone, looking like he'd start crying soon. He did never cry, though.

"Wow, guys," I heard Rock-Rock say first when he arrived on the deck. I ran the rest of the stairs up in the dark (I had given my flashlight for Jekyll, who had broke his own in pieces) and of course I couldn't help falling. When I had cut my knee, I sumbled upstairs just to stun myself for plain surprise. The others looked at least as surprised as I and it really wasn't a miracle, as the object I'd seen earlier today was something twistedly strange:
An umbrella.




This is a story I made up yesterday. It's available also in Finnish in my deviantART gallery. Browse Gallery -> There it is. Called Sateenvarjo. And if I happen not to continue working with this, I have to spoil:




The red thing is blood as the gods (teachers) killed Anna with it.

That might be the title of the song which is playing on background. It comes from the silver-coloured radio's fake wooden speakers. I wish they were really made of wood but they aren't. The song is quite good for background music. If this was a movie, the song would play in some part where the people would do something, without talking. Run away and hide, find something when they come back from the holiday, travel somewhere. Something like that.

The exam week is on. It's not depressing me, stressing me, getting me out of my nerves. No, it's boring me. The school days aren't so long and they don't keep me that busy and the subjects I have to read in the end of this period are damn boring, except history. It might be only interesting subject. I wish the exam week ended and the next period would start and I'd have more interesting subjects. The next exam week won't be this horrible. The reason of the horriblity of this is obviously the boredom. I'd like to see some people, I'd like to meet them, I'd like to talk to them. I can't. I either don't see them, live too far away, or just am too shy. The last one annoys me most. And the person I'd like to talk to seems not to know that I excist. No, really they know, but they just don't care. At least I think so. I just wish I haven't to, but I'm just being realistic and I can't do anything about it as I'm too shy and like-me. I'm too IC. 

Well hello again. This moment is strange. My laptop (which is now back from repair, wohooo!) is set on my electric organ (well that sounds weirder than it is) as I didn't have any tables free - they're full of books and clothes and drawing thingies. Today was a funny day - or not. I've done nothing, not even my homework but I deal with it suffering the consequenses later. That might be (and most probably truly is) not wise but I do it anyway. I'm too tired, hungry, and flying away at the moment. What does that mean? It feels like you've ate two pounds of sugar, ran across the street and then made a snow angel on summer. Confused? Thinking I use something psychedelic stuff? Wrong! (Insert that strange BAAAAAM sound here, and some red X's.) I don't need such things to be strange at times or some other times too.

Tomorrow. Dancing! Today. Nothing! But being on computer and lazing around, listening to lots of music and drawing. My drawing's background is almost ready! I'm so happy with it - it looks so fucking fabulous so far. On Friday I'll be off to the party... Looking forward to it. I have clothes, I have shoes, I am happy. The shoes are my mother's really, but I kind of stole them. I really asked if I could have them but I'm so going to keep them as my own after  borrowing them. I think she won't really mind.

I forgot to draw my scetch of the day yesterday, so I did the number 19 today. I did also number 20. I don't think it's cheating, as I wrote the dates down on them correctly - I was honest once a lifetime and wrote "20110" on them both. Yes, that's how I write dates. No, it's not official way to mark them up in The End -country (some think it's called Finland). I've been thinking of drawing cards. Playing cards. Today I already drew the Queen of Hearts and the 9th Spade.

Hello, all readers. (Are there any? Well, I wish there is...) What the heck has been going on? Where I've been all this time? Well, I've been at school, mostly. Then my computer got crazy. It turned deathly slow at first and then it just didn't work at all. So, as me and my aunt couldn't do anything for it, I told her to take it to the shop and get it repaired as she works in the city and could take the computer there when going to work. She took it there and the dude there had been asking the setup disks of the computer but as you don't need them to re-install my computer, there weren't such. However, about the question we counted 1+1 (which is obviously 42, isn't it?) and thought that they might re-install the system there. They had also asked what files has to be taken from there to safety and my aunt had luckily said that everything: text files and pictures and also music. Otherwise all the songs I have there and my Contagious project and several pieces of digital art would have been destroyed! I hope the repair-dudes took the word seriously.

So, now I'm on my parents' laptop as my own is in some computer repairing thing in Oulu city. I don't have tablet here, I don't have Sims 2 (haa, but I have 3 and it's okay as I don't have number 2 here), I don't have Contagious... Damn it, I could say.

Otherwise I've been good, actually everything has gone very nicely! My friends are great, school is okay and there is lots of activities on freetime. I've started my Mythconduct (deviantART art exchange) work and I'm very proud of it already as I did my very first sea of dancing flames and it looks great. I honestly think so and I'm really happy about it. Rammstein's album Rosenrot has been a huge source of inspiration when working with that flamy picture. I've also done all the scetches I've needed to do so far for the 365 Day Scetch Challenge. I haven't had time and energy to upload those and I feel quite bad for it as if I don't upload my work soon, I will be so far behind with them, that I will never catch up with uploading them on net.

Well, what else has been happening? I don't know. Me and a friend of mine started getting dance lessons (dancing once a week there) and we've been thinking of going to gym once a week also. Don't know yet when we will start it, but hopefully soon. Exercising is so much more fun with another person! And the painting lessons start also next week - day after tomorrow really. Painting two and half hours on Mondays since then! But first I won't start a new painting, I will draw there no matter what. I have to get the Mythconduct piece ready and with all these activities I maybe don't have time if I don't do it during the painting lessons too. I've already spend 7 hours with it and it isn't even half way ready!

Hmm. Re-reading HP & CoS, American version. I couldn't find the British one from the library (some punk had borrowed it before me, damn it!) so I had to take this one. And today I left a shout in one online sale, Huuto.net. It's like a ... but works online. The person who offers the biggest price gets the item, that's really it. So, I left my offers in two items there: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them -books. The last one will be shipped from London England England if I get it, and it will be quite rare in these corners as they haven't been selling it for about eight years and I've never seen the English edition of it on Finnish book shops. So, I will be so happy if I get it! Other HP fandom related thingies, I wandered my way towards the Leaky Cauldron and I have no idea how I could have been not seeing it before. What ever, I registered on there few days (was it a week?)  ago and have enjoyed being around that place. I also registered on Toujours Pur, another great HP forum... And I'm also at some finnish one, Vuotis, whiches meeting I'll be going when it is in the city I live near. Just have to check when it is. I just hope that it's not next week as they have the party of our school next Friday. It will last till 2 AM (aka this one will not sleep at all until its maybe 4 o'clock). What ever, I'll be happy getting there, as my friends go there too. Yay. Looking forward to it and other things.

Oh gosh, I have so busy week next week. Just started to think about it, but really, I have something to do every day! On Monday the painting lessons start, on Tuesday me and one friend of mine will be introducing our school to the ninthgraders who can come to study there next year (only to one group of them really, not all of the people who come to see the school of course) and after that me and other people on the 4th course of music will be going to see Encore of the Opera Carmen. On Thursday there's the dance lesson, on Friday the party, and if there's the meeting on Saturday... Oh gosh. Then if we go to the gym on Sunday. Yay, what a busy week. But I'm not sure about the Vuotis meeting yet as I haven't checked when it is from the forum. It might be now and it can be other time too, have to take a look at that...

But soon this one will be drawing the scetch of the day again (I've got a funny feeling about Snape-torturing, so I could draw about that... *devious grin*) and run away from the computer. Later!

Really it's a lie as I just took my contacts off my eyes. Now I don't see but I don't have to either as it's so late that tiny school girls should go sleeping soon if they're going to be awake in the morning - early that is, as I want to get all things done before I go and I have much to do. It's still cold outside, about -30 degrees C. I don't mind as I don't have to be there freezing to death - if I have to be outside for a long time, I have warm clothes - and I don't really have to be there for a long time as I live so near the shops and the school and the library.

Talking about school, today was the first day of school this year. It was quite nice really, I was happy to see all my friends again there! Studying wasn't so bad either, as it never really bothers me except for few classes which are soon history as there aren't many necessary courses on high school, so it's okay and I can handle it.

I feel happy. Even though my eyes hurt and it's quite cold, I am. Everything is fine.

Yesterday I was watching the movie Avatar. I loved it. Here's what I said about it on dA:


And! Today I rented a movie Pan's Labyrinth. I liked that too. And the next movie I'm going to see is that Alice in Wonderland, Tim Burton's version I mean. He's one of my favourite directors and the story is amazing so, looking forward to it.

Yeheah, back in here again. I found out that my internet connection here is way slower than the one my parents have. That's unfair! But I have to deal with it. This thing has an agreement for two years and I haven't had it for even a year yet. I have to survive with this connection now. Hmm. I'm really happy to be in here again but not so happy for staying up until 00.00 again as I seem to be doing. Damn it. My sleep pattern is really mad and it's not good at all. So, tomorrow I will be waking up after seven hours of bad quality dreaming and I have to stay up until maybe 22.00. Why? Because I can't get sleep! I really can't. I have problems with sleeping, I seriously do.

Normally I go to sleep around 22-23 (school days) -> I start sleeping after midnight. If I try to go to sleep earlier, it doesn't help at all. At 6 PM I feel tired as I always wake up 6.30 in the morning. When it's 6 PM, I feel like going sleeping for the night but haa, it's not night yet so I don't go to sleep. In the evening I'm not tired at all. The tirity I should be feeling gets me in time of 18 and not in 22 where it should. It's so damn annoying and keeps me from sleeping. Then I get tired and then I get nervous. I'm already a little nervous will I wake up early enough to go to school on Thursday. But, luckily the school starts 10.30 AM that day. I don't think I'll miss that... Or at least I hope I won't.

Fuck my English, I'm tired to thinking about it as my leg is so sore that it keeps me thinking about it being sore. Damndamndamn. Tomorrow will be luckily a nice day. Waiting for it then. I will be going to movies (all by myself, haha) to see the movie Avatar on 3D. I've heard it's good (at least it seems visually interesting which usually means that the movie is at least entertaining if not good)... What else. Today I bought two books. One of them is some huge art book and the other is The Wizard of Oz. My mother bought me a winter jacket and pants as it's very cold in here. Now it's only -16 degrees C but the day before yesterday it was -30. Nice winter weather of Finland! I really like these. No sarcasm!